For whatever reason, we all have those few things in our lives that we just can’t seem to let go of. Sometimes it’s that person who’s constantly on our brain, and other times it’s the friend who only seems happy when they’re gossiping about your former classmates or peers. It can be difficult to let go of those people in our lives even though they drain us of our energy and leave us feeling negative, but it’s certainly not impossible. However, we must also realize that the things holding us back are not always another person, sometimes it’s a task, a hobby, or even a habit. Though you may love these people, habits, or hobbies, they’re chipping away at the happiness that you deserve in your life.
Since we know how daunting this life change can feel, we’ve come up with a few thoughts that you should keep in mind while you’re on the path to getting rid of toxcity.
“Letting go doesn’t mean that you don’t care about someone anymore. It’s just realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.” -Deborah Reber
Sometimes the people or things in our lives become toxic. They overwhelm us, and in the end, we’re left doubting ourselves, feeling horrible about the direction we’re heading. Maybe the person bringing you down is a gossiper, maybe they’re the type of person who feels better about themselves when they put you down. You must recognize that they aren’t the one going home feeling bad about themselves; you are. Always remember that your health (mental and physical) need to be a top priority. If someone in your circle is causing you distress, it is 100% up to you to take matters into your own hands and make a change. You have two options: continue to feel down because you haven’t made any changes, or you let go of the person bringing you stress and negativity.
Frequently we’re longing to change the way that someone acts or feels. But to be frank, it’s just an impossible task. Change is brought upon when the individual would like to make a personal change–not when someone else tells them that they should change. If the negative person in your life doesn’t show signs of changing, do not feel guilty when you have to let them go from your life. If one day they happen to make a change for the better, then by all means feel free to reintegrate them back into your life. You must always do what’s best for your health, and holding onto negativity is only going to hurt you.
It will never be selfish to take care of your health, even if that means letting go of some of the people around you.
“There’s an important difference between giving up and letting go.” -Jessica Hatchigan
You must understand that there is a massive difference between giving up on something or someone and letting go of a negative influence. If you have given up on a task, you’ve decided that whatever the task is, it isn’t worth the effort. If you’re letting go of a task, you’re recognizing that after tons of effort, high emotion and stress, you can no longer handle the wear and tear that this task is having on your life. Always keep this difference in mind because there will be times when someone tries to tell you that you’ve given up on someone/something. Look them in the eye and tell them that you’ve let go of that, not given up and don’t feel remorseful about it.